Saturday, January 5, 2008So Where'd I Go?
Lean back and relax. This is going to take some time to tell.
So my last blog post was in September, and it was totally unrelated to television news photography. It was what really seemed like my last ditch attempt to save my blog with something, even if my something was nothing interesting.
Essentially, I have developed a real apathy for my job. Not necessarily FOX23, as they are good people, but for news shooting in general. I came to Tulsa mainly for two reasons. One, so I could be a lot closer to my family. Of course this turns out to be moot because I am still to far to drive up there unless I can get some time off and take - at a minimum - a three day weekend. That never happens, so I don't really see them much more often then I did when I lived in Vegas. Top that off with the fact that Allegant now offers direct flights from Springfield to Vegas and back (which, like anything having to do with Springfield and Capitol Airport, won't last long) I was pretty bummed.
Secondly, doing nothing but VOSOTs on the overnights, I had no real chance to do any story telling. So I came here with the expectation that going back to general assignment stuff, I'd get to flex my creative muscles again. I was wrong. That may sound like a negative slam against 23, but its really not. You have a hard news station that is in a market with very little hard news. It makes for some pretty boring stories. It works for them, as FOX's ratings are going up, but it wasn't anything near what I had expected or hoped for.
So anyway, the apathy and... I won't go as far to call it depression, but it was a really melancholy outlook on everything... It really nixed my desire to do anything, especially things that were related to work. I was essentially going to work, doing my job to the best of my ability, and going back home. I started playing EVE again on a regular basis, where at least I could make people feel somewhat as miserable as me by blowing up their internet spaceships.
November went by, in which nothing of note happened. I dislike having to create stories at work, so why would I want to do it here? Thanksgiving came by... I had the holiday off (but ended up working Thanksgiving Day anyway due to a coworkers injury) and spent it at home trying to figure shit out. Couldn't come up with anything!
End of November I went home to Springfield. Spent time with my family, drove around and cried about how Springfield sucks, and came back. The worst part of the whole thing was that I avoided several of my friends, and even didn't tell them I was coming back. Why? Not because I didn't like them, but because I simply wanted to spend the time with my family and not have to deal with drama that usually ends up bombarding me every time I go to that God forsaken city. I honestly feel like a complete asshole for doing it, but I have found trying to please everyone usually ends up a total failure.
Once I got back, December 7th happened.
The truck doesn't look that bad (more pictures here), which I think is a plus for the Ford Explorer that outweighs the issue with gas mileage, but this crash made December 7 the second scariest day of my life.
I was having a good day. It was Friday, and I was on VOSOTs. I'd shot a couple and now I was taking my dinner break. After eating in the parking lot of the QT on 31st and Sheridan, I chatted with a cop for a bit, then began to head back towards the station. As I reached the edge of the parking lot, getting ready to pull out onto Sheridan, I felt a strange sensation come over me. The next thing I know, I have 3 firefighters trying to get me out of the Explorer. I was totally out of it, but I was conscious. The firefighters noticed this and were telling me to come out of the car. I tried to open the door but couldn't. They informed me I was going to have to come out the passenger side. I did the best I could to comply in my state, but was pretty much just dragged out by the fire department.
As I started to come to my senses, I began asking what happened. According to the paramedics and police, I apparently had a seizure, caused the Explorer to cross 5 lanes of Sheridan (which at about 6:30 PM is very busy, so the fact I hit no one on Sheridan is amazing), flew through the Drug Warehouse parking lot, plowed through three cars and came to a stop when I or a car I hit collided with the building.
One other person sustained minor injuries - sore shoulder and some glass in his eye.
I was taken by ambulance to the hospital and released a bit later. I would like to take this moment to express my gratitude to Holly, our General Manager, Melanie, our News Director, and Chad, our assistant News Director for all coming to the hospital to check on me. And of course my Chief, John, for taking me to get my meds, to get food and driving me home.
The rest of the newsroom also showed great concern for me, and I appreciate that. I've only been there for 8 months at this time, but they treated me like I'd been there forever. Thank you guys.
I could talk about this for hours. The idea that I could just blank out and not have any recollection of colliding into a building scares the crap out of me. I still have to undergo more tests to find out if I have some sort of seizure disorder or if this was just an isolated thing that may have resulted from my blood pressure.
The Sunday (or Monday, I forget) after this happened, the ice storm came. I lost power and didn't have any for 4 days. I spent two nights sleeping in John's office at work and ended up only taking 2 days off to recover from the crash. Nothing in December managed to rekindle my desire to blog, or really to converse or interact with anyone else in the world.
So now it's January. What's changed? Nothing really, except for the fact I sit around and think to myself 'Exactly how long can I sit around here feeling sorry for myself?' I realize that I shouldn't do that, nor do I need to. I was bitching about not being able to do anything creative, but I have something creative right here.
I really enjoy writing. If I could figure out someway to do it for a living, that would be grand. But for now, I can do it here. Commenting on things in the world and what it's like being a news photographer, for as long as this is going to last. (I tell myself that this is going to be my last TV news job, but I also said that about KLAS.)
I have other things to work on as well. I have my fanfiction, which I haven't worked on since 2006 I think, I have other stuff I have been writing, some for Eve, some just original stuff I have come up with. There is plenty I can do. I also realize I do something creative every day. I try and make otherwise mundane, non visual stories as interesting (visually) as possible.
Anyway, to summarize, I am going to do more blogging. Daily. Even if it is just a link to the story I did that day, I am going to blog. Of course after three months of inactivity, no one will be reading, but whatever. Hopefully someone will notice and word will spread that ewink is back.
Happy New Year.
Erin
So my last blog post was in September, and it was totally unrelated to television news photography. It was what really seemed like my last ditch attempt to save my blog with something, even if my something was nothing interesting.
Essentially, I have developed a real apathy for my job. Not necessarily FOX23, as they are good people, but for news shooting in general. I came to Tulsa mainly for two reasons. One, so I could be a lot closer to my family. Of course this turns out to be moot because I am still to far to drive up there unless I can get some time off and take - at a minimum - a three day weekend. That never happens, so I don't really see them much more often then I did when I lived in Vegas. Top that off with the fact that Allegant now offers direct flights from Springfield to Vegas and back (which, like anything having to do with Springfield and Capitol Airport, won't last long) I was pretty bummed.
Secondly, doing nothing but VOSOTs on the overnights, I had no real chance to do any story telling. So I came here with the expectation that going back to general assignment stuff, I'd get to flex my creative muscles again. I was wrong. That may sound like a negative slam against 23, but its really not. You have a hard news station that is in a market with very little hard news. It makes for some pretty boring stories. It works for them, as FOX's ratings are going up, but it wasn't anything near what I had expected or hoped for.
So anyway, the apathy and... I won't go as far to call it depression, but it was a really melancholy outlook on everything... It really nixed my desire to do anything, especially things that were related to work. I was essentially going to work, doing my job to the best of my ability, and going back home. I started playing EVE again on a regular basis, where at least I could make people feel somewhat as miserable as me by blowing up their internet spaceships.
November went by, in which nothing of note happened. I dislike having to create stories at work, so why would I want to do it here? Thanksgiving came by... I had the holiday off (but ended up working Thanksgiving Day anyway due to a coworkers injury) and spent it at home trying to figure shit out. Couldn't come up with anything!
End of November I went home to Springfield. Spent time with my family, drove around and cried about how Springfield sucks, and came back. The worst part of the whole thing was that I avoided several of my friends, and even didn't tell them I was coming back. Why? Not because I didn't like them, but because I simply wanted to spend the time with my family and not have to deal with drama that usually ends up bombarding me every time I go to that God forsaken city. I honestly feel like a complete asshole for doing it, but I have found trying to please everyone usually ends up a total failure.
Once I got back, December 7th happened.
I was having a good day. It was Friday, and I was on VOSOTs. I'd shot a couple and now I was taking my dinner break. After eating in the parking lot of the QT on 31st and Sheridan, I chatted with a cop for a bit, then began to head back towards the station. As I reached the edge of the parking lot, getting ready to pull out onto Sheridan, I felt a strange sensation come over me. The next thing I know, I have 3 firefighters trying to get me out of the Explorer. I was totally out of it, but I was conscious. The firefighters noticed this and were telling me to come out of the car. I tried to open the door but couldn't. They informed me I was going to have to come out the passenger side. I did the best I could to comply in my state, but was pretty much just dragged out by the fire department.
As I started to come to my senses, I began asking what happened. According to the paramedics and police, I apparently had a seizure, caused the Explorer to cross 5 lanes of Sheridan (which at about 6:30 PM is very busy, so the fact I hit no one on Sheridan is amazing), flew through the Drug Warehouse parking lot, plowed through three cars and came to a stop when I or a car I hit collided with the building.
One other person sustained minor injuries - sore shoulder and some glass in his eye.
I was taken by ambulance to the hospital and released a bit later. I would like to take this moment to express my gratitude to Holly, our General Manager, Melanie, our News Director, and Chad, our assistant News Director for all coming to the hospital to check on me. And of course my Chief, John, for taking me to get my meds, to get food and driving me home.
The rest of the newsroom also showed great concern for me, and I appreciate that. I've only been there for 8 months at this time, but they treated me like I'd been there forever. Thank you guys.
I could talk about this for hours. The idea that I could just blank out and not have any recollection of colliding into a building scares the crap out of me. I still have to undergo more tests to find out if I have some sort of seizure disorder or if this was just an isolated thing that may have resulted from my blood pressure.
The Sunday (or Monday, I forget) after this happened, the ice storm came. I lost power and didn't have any for 4 days. I spent two nights sleeping in John's office at work and ended up only taking 2 days off to recover from the crash. Nothing in December managed to rekindle my desire to blog, or really to converse or interact with anyone else in the world.
So now it's January. What's changed? Nothing really, except for the fact I sit around and think to myself 'Exactly how long can I sit around here feeling sorry for myself?' I realize that I shouldn't do that, nor do I need to. I was bitching about not being able to do anything creative, but I have something creative right here.
I really enjoy writing. If I could figure out someway to do it for a living, that would be grand. But for now, I can do it here. Commenting on things in the world and what it's like being a news photographer, for as long as this is going to last. (I tell myself that this is going to be my last TV news job, but I also said that about KLAS.)
I have other things to work on as well. I have my fanfiction, which I haven't worked on since 2006 I think, I have other stuff I have been writing, some for Eve, some just original stuff I have come up with. There is plenty I can do. I also realize I do something creative every day. I try and make otherwise mundane, non visual stories as interesting (visually) as possible.
Anyway, to summarize, I am going to do more blogging. Daily. Even if it is just a link to the story I did that day, I am going to blog. Of course after three months of inactivity, no one will be reading, but whatever. Hopefully someone will notice and word will spread that ewink is back.
Happy New Year.
Erin
posted by ewink at 2:22 AM
ewink's FUNKDAFIED Ranma 1/2 Site
3 Comments:
Glad you're back!
Glad you're doing alright! And it's good to have you back again (in an online bloggy kind of way!)
Hi E-wink! Glad to see you're back and doing better! I hope they figure out what happened asap.
I'm sorry to hear about the job sitch...but just think of it this way! You're making producers happy with the local content...and when you get those nice fluffy soft stories you're getting those stories that half cancel all the gloom and doom in the world!
Happy New Year!
-JV
Post a Comment
Links to this post:
Create a Link
<< Home