Resolution (a/k/a The Last Post of 2005)

As I explained back in April, I really make my serious New Years Resolutions then, since that is in fact the beginning of a new year for me. But I think it's also important to make some other resolutions now as well.

Personally, for me it's the serious, life altering ones in April, and the others now. So here are a list of a few of my resolutions.

Quit smoking, again - This time though I am not going to mess around with this cold turkey shit. Going to go buy the patch!

Drink more - I know that sounds like a backwards resolution, but I don't drink enough. I have had the same 24 pack of MGD in my fridge for over six months. I need to have a little more fun, since I've only got about 40 or so more years before I'm dead!

Take work a little more seriously - That going to be the toughest one, for some reasons which I won't go into here. I guess that means I have to start tonight. But you know, thinking about it, I also include my writing in that and my show. Plus my web site development. I think that this one really will be the toughest one of all.

Buy groceries - Damned McDonald's is too expensive.

That's pretty much it. We'll see if I can live up to any of these. Hopefully one will lead into the other. Maybe once I quit smoking and start drinking more often, I won't be so damned lethargic and will do something fun and do some really good writing?

We'll see.

See y'all in 2006. Happy New Year!

CES Here I Come!

I hope.

I am registered, but since my company, Douglas Avenue Interactive, is so small, I don't know if they will let me in!

If you don't know, CES or the International Consumer Electronics Show, is the biggest electronics trade show on the planet. It's to people like me what a massive vibrator and dildo convention would be to lesbians.

So I have two motives for going. The first is to see what is available in online content distribution and digital video/editing software (that's my business purpose). And of course there is the personal aspect to it. Granted I won't be able to buy anything (yet), but it will still be so much fun to see all the new toys before they are available to the public.

However, something I didn't see till after I registered, they want both an ID and a business card or company letter head to show that I actually belong there.

I am beginning to think that I should have gone the press route and gotten a badge via Channel 8. But I am trying not to be dishonest here (for once). I guess since I own the company there is nothing wrong with finally making some letterhead and printing a letter saying that I am representing DAi, right?

We'll see. If they won't let me in, I'll get one of the reporters from the station and drag them down there with me and get in that way!

SPAM Experiment; Conclusion

The conclusion is that I get a lot of SPAM, but not as much as originally thought.

7 AM YESTERDAY

As you can see, at 7AM yesterday I emptied both of my SPAM boxes. Now. here are the results from today!

7 AM TODAY

As you can see, in my Yahoo! box (the folder marked 'BULK'), I received 227 SPAM emails in 24 hours. I have noticed before that I have gotten upwards of 400 in a day. Hell, the week leading up to Christmas I think I had 1500 in my box. That's a lot of SPAM!
My douglasavenue.com email, which isn't as old as my Yahoo! email (I got ewink@yahoo.com in 1996) I only received 14, most of those to my FUNKDAFIED email since I use that in newsgroups, the damned spammers get it from there.

Anyway, Just wanted to waste some time. Bye bye!

What a Difference 128 Megs Makes!

Back in March I chronicled the creation of Mai, my computer. In it I had noted that my former tower, Alix2 had been so kind to donate her 8X AGP 128MEG video card. Well for the past few months it had been making weird noises... And being very weird myself, it takes something very weird for me to consider it weird.

Anyway, I was having a bitch of a time playing a couple of games. The graphics would lock up and all sorts of odd shit would happen. Plus, I have to be honest, I was getting really freakin' sick of nVidia anyway.

The new drivers wouldn't work with two of my games, Eve or Sim City 4. But the old drivers wouldn't work with Civilizations or Falcon 4.0! So after receiving $100 for Christmas from my wonderful grandparents I told the card to go fornicate its self and bought a 256MB ATI Radeon 9550 from circuitcity.com. I did the online ordering/store pick up thing (which is actually more hassle than its worth) and got it for 107$!

I was a little worried about this card. First off, it doesn't have a cooling fan, just a heat sync. And even though I don't know if I am ever going to get back into it, Eve put a LOT of strain on the video card because of all the 3-D stuff.

Secondly, I have been with nVidia all my life, so making the change scared me.

I have to say it was the most irrational fear of them all. I installed the card and I could tell a HUGE difference just by looking at the Windows desktop. It's so much sharper, it doesn't flicker, I can see more color definition... WOW!

Then I played Civilizations. HOLY SHIT! I was actually able to play the game and all the in game movies without the bastard crashing! WHEEEE! The detail of the maps and the units (who actually do a lot of movement, I just never noticed due to the screen freezing up) was unbelievable.

Finally I decided to play Falcon 4.0 (a combat flight simulator which is too complicated for me right now, but does have 3-D graphics). And I will be completely honest with you folks here. I really had the urge to masturbate after seeing the textures and 3-D aircraft models. I blew something up and it exploded in almost photo-realistic glory.

I almost think I was more amazed over how a simple 128 MB could make such a difference. I mean if I added 128 MB of system memory, I doubt it would speed things up much at all. But then again I think I was this impressed when I went from 64MB PCI to 128 MB AGP.

I can't wait till I get $1000. They had a 1 GB AGP card... Then again I am saving up for a 1 TB HDD (TB = Terabyte or 1,000 Gigabytes or 1,000,000 Megabytes) The unbelievable amount of anime and porn that could be stored on that drive is, well, unbelievable!

Woooooooooooo.

SPAM Experiment

I am emptying my SPAM boxes on both my Yahoo! and DouglasAvenue email accounts (both managed by Yahoo!) at 7AM. I'm going to find out how many SPAM messages I get in 24 hours.

I know it's gotta be a lot, since when I emptied it, before it even refreshed there was 1 new SPAM message......

Busted...

Seems like Rainy didn't forget about me this time. Heh...

You have been "busted" The rules are simple, now that you have been busted, you must confess to 3 things that you do that others don't know about.
(This will be fun... NOT!)

1. I have an irrational fear of spiders and heights. I'm not talking about a regular fear, I'm talking EXTREMELY irrational. Once there was a spider in the door way when I worked at FOX Minneapolis. It was the only way out, so I had to come and get my boss (who was my replacement) to come and kill it so I could leave the building... Like I said, it's irrational.

2. I cry at the sad parts of TV shows and movies... I'm a vagina away from being a girl... :|

3. My last year in Minnesota I got totally obliterated on booze and nearly died (alcohol poisoning) in the bathroom of an Ember's Restaurant. It was a life changing experience and probably the main reason I'm not cool anymore! But I'm not dead either, so I guess it evens out.

Now I need to bust four people...

Fine, BOJ (yeah I got you twice), Jim Rose, Sapphoto and McFly (if he even has a blog... heh...) Y'all are busted. Get too it, chop chop.

The Darkest Crime Scene in the World!

I am not really going to touch on how totally bastard like it is to murder someone on Christmas, even though this murder seems to be more like an accidental murder than anything else. But still, I was worried that I would have to go to at least one Christmas Morning murder and I did.

The real bitch about this was that it was out, south of the city off Las Vegas Blvd. I didn't even know people lived this far out, but they do! The problem was that there were no street lights around. So it was very dark, as you can tell by my pictures here.

I bumped up my camera as high as I could to 18db gain and STILL couldn't hardly see anything. I was actually surprised when I watched it on TV... It came out a lot better than I thought it would, considering. But it was times like this I missed my NewsChannel 20 gear. I had a brand new DVCPro camera there that had a 30db super gain. And (this part will probably only be understood by the other photogs) what was cool was the noise was soft enough in the video to where even at 30db the grain wasn't that distracting.

In fact, here is a video capture from a story I shot on 30db gain there.


Anyway the darkness continued even after the detective cars began to show up. It was 3AM and there wasn't going to be any sunlight for another three and a half hours, and I didn't plan on staying that long.

Then my photography was foiled by a cop who turned on his headlights to see something. Everything was now back lit. When I irised down enough so my shot wasn't flooded out, I couldn't see ANYTHING! I asked the perimeter cop if he could radio his buddy and have him turn off his lights, but he just laughed at me.

So much for my Christmas present from METRO...

At any rate, the Homicide guys were waiting on a search warrant so they gave us our sound really quick and we bolted to Triple Play for Christmas Dinner. NBC, ABC and CBS all sitting, enjoying our Philly cheese steaks without a care in the world.

Actually now that I think about it, we ate before the murder...

Well, whatever. I've lost track of what I was talking about, so here is the moral of the story.

Even in the city of neon and bright flashing lights, there's one block that's dark as a mother fuka...

Tag This!

I've been tagged by RevRee! What the deal is that I have to answer the following questions, then tag some people myself! Sounds like fun! (It beats my Rush Limbaugh inspired rant I was planning this morning. Blogging rule #1, never post pissed off...)

You get one wish of anything, what would you ask for?
A time machine. (I am aware that I was susposed to wish for world peace here, but what do I care if the rest of the world hates each other?)

Wish for 6 more wishes: (neat!)
1. I wish I had the cash to finance my show...
2. I wish I had the cash to pay back my mom and Blaine for everything!
3. I wish I already knew how to play the drums so I wouldn't have to learn...
4. I wish my foot didn't hurt...
5. I wish I had my own Leer Jet
6. (Fine) I wish for world peace. (No, I don't)

What animal would you be?
Turtle!

Something you want to do in your life.
Travel to Japan

One song you could listen to over and over again.
Linkin' Park - Somewhere I Belong

Coke or Pepsi?
Diet Pepsi

Something you currently desire.
(Heh....) A purpose...

One good deed you've done lately.
I gave the homeless man at Sahara and LVB a $10 on Xmas morning.

A funny moment in your life.
We talking ha ha funny or strange funny? Cause my entire life is a joke!

I think thats about it! I am now tagging the following people

#1 Lenslinger

#2 Smitty

#3 Colonel Corn

#4 The loveable BOJ!

I am sure the three photogs are like 'Say what?' But all other other PointlessBloggers on the DBN have already been tagged! :( So take that you professionals who never blog about anything pointless! :)

Merry Christmas, ya bastards!

:)

Hope it's a good one!

Erin

Open Letters

An open letter to service industry employees, especially those of you in fast food.

Dear Employees,

First, let me state that I feel your pain. No one wants to be thirty years old and still working at McDonald's, Burger King, etcetera. But sometimes it's just something you have to do. When I moved from Milwaukee to Springfield back in 2002, I couldn't find a TV job, so I got a job there. Didn't like it, but it beats being unemployed.

That said, I'd like to get to the point.

It's not MY fault you work there. It's not the fault of the customers that you work there. In fact, if it wasn't for fat-asses like myself, you'd have no job! So don't take out your disgust for your job or your employer on us.

When there is no one around, feel free to curse, scream, bitch, moan and just plain be unhappy. But when you have a customer, someone who might already be having a crappy day themselves, at least pretend to be nice. Pretend to like your job.

Don't throw the food at us. Don't rip the money from our hands! Try to smile and make eye contact with us, for just a moment. Wish us a good day and if we try to tell you 'Happy Holidays', don't slam the window in our face!

Your attitude can change people, since we are affected by the people we are around. It's a real bitch when you're in a good mood and you go to get a double cheese burger only to have to deal with some whiney bitch who seems to only be concerned with herself.

That's why it's called the SERVICE industry!

Anyway, I beg upon you. Stop being assholes and at least pretend to be nice instead of punishing everyone else for your bad decisions.

Thank you.

Open Letter to Drivers

Dear Drivers,

What's your fucking hurry?

Why do you feel the need to zip between cars in order to get in front of the guy who is doing ONLY 47 in the 45? Do you not understand or see the stop light ahead is red? (They're always red in Las Vegas.) Why do you find it necessary to cut people off and almost cause crashes? What in the world could be so important in your life that you need to get there RIGHT NOW?

I am sure it's nothing, since asshole cock-sucker mother fuckers like yourself don't have friends.

And to the person who honks at the car in front of them the very second the light turns green. Don't try that shit with me. Not only will I purposely not go, I will back up so you can't pull around me.

How do you like them apples, dickhead?

One more thing, I've given up on you people using your turn signals. I understand that the act of activating them is one that is both difficult and over burdensome for the mentally challenged, such as yourself. But when you are making a lane change, DON'T ACTIVE THE FUCKER HALF WAY THROUGH THE CHANGE! That's like calling work when you're half way home and telling them you're leaving. That would be like me punching you then saying 'I'm going to hit you now!'.

Thank you.

Open Letter to President Bush

You should be impeached.

I was willing to believe that you didn't lie about the WMD, and that you were just wrong. I was willing to believe that you didn't purposely overlook any intelligence that allowed 9/11 to happen. I was willing to support the Iraq war, even after there were no WMD's found because it did free the Iraqi people from a tyrant.

But now you've gone too far.

From the Atlantic Ocean to the Pacific Ocean. North from the Canadian border to the Mexican border in the south. Alaska, Hawaii, and all the little US islands around the world. Anyone in any of those places are protected by a document that YOU swore to uphold and protect.

The constitution.

In it there is a provision saying that you must have a warrant to do searches (including wiretaps). Yet you feel that you have the 'inherent right' - which sounds to me like you are saying 'Divine Right' - to do so during a time of war.

Sorry, no.

The FISA court is just a formality, as they have granted everything (with a couple of exceptions) that has come to them. The fact that you bypassed them makes me believe that you both didn't have any justification for the wiretaps and that you are trying to set a precedent.

The precedent being that you are allowed to wiretap anyone you want, as long as you say 'national security is at risk'.

What a vague term. Could you consider this letter a risk to national security? I mean, my words might incite the people to revolt against you! My words could make the terrorists think they are winning and launch more attacks! My words could hurt your feelings and then you won't be able to get a good nights sleep.

What you've done, regardless of how many presidential lawyers think otherwise, is a violation of the Foreign Intelligence Surveillance Act of 1978, which is a felony punishable by up to 15 years in prison. And since you have committed a felony, you are eligible for impeachment.

I'm not thrilled about the thought of Cheney being President, but I think it would set a precedent for the future.

The PEOPLE take our rights seriously and no Chicken Little ramblings about terrorists wanting to kill our puppies and eat our babies is going to be justification for a theocratic police state.

And to the DHS agent placing me on the watch list now, my name is Erin Michael Winking. I'm a male, I was born in Springfield, Illinois and live in Las Vegas, Nevada. And I am not scared of you nor the terrorists.

Thank you.

How do I get associated with these things?

So I am checking my Mapstats to see where my visitors come from, and what they came for and I found the above.
I have no idea what combination of words there are on my blog that would cause Google to think that I am associated with the words listed on that graphic (I'm not going to say it because I don't want my blog to rank higher the next time some sicko looks for said pictures).
I also am afraid to know where I ranked in the listing. I hope that I was REALLY far down and this pervert simply went through 56 pages of Google results looking for said merchandise.
For the record, if you are here looking for that, you will fail. I don't have anything of that nature on my blog as I am not a demented sick bastard who is going to hell.

Well I guess I am, but I STILL don't have anything to do with that! So go away. (The perverts, not my loyal seven readers.)

Boycott Lifted!

Like almost a week ago, I just have been sleeping alot and forgot to update lately. :)

But I couldn't have done it with you!

I love you people!

Let's boycott something else. Just for S & G! Any ideas? (Pizza Hut is off limits. They are my Jesus...)

My blog is 'objectionable'....

I guess.

My dad tried to log on from Panera Bread down in Sarasota where he's spending the winter and their filtering software apparently told him that my blog was 'pornographic' and/or 'objectionable'.

So I went to the SonicWALL Internet Security website (the company which apparently supplied Panera with it's blocking 'technology') and found that my side was 'unrated'.

??

So they block ALL unrated sites?! Considering there are probably millions (if not close to a billion) websites online, do they need to rate each one before allowing people to view it?

I filed a request to have my blog rated, and cleared (considering my potty mouth is the worst you will find here - I try and make it SOMEWHAT safe for work) so people who surf the internet for 'news photographer blog', 'anime girls' or 'big ass holes' at Panera Bread can view it.

I think I can honestly say that I am a little outraged at this. What's the point of having free internet access at your business if you're going to not let people surf where they want?

That is why I am calling for a boycott of Panera Bread until my good name is cleared and my blog is assessable by all.

Together we can make this happen.

The Last Samurai

So I'm all doped up and flipping through the channels last night when I stumble upon Cinemax (a/k/a Skinamax). As usual there was a horribly produced soft core porno on about some cow girl ghost and two lesbians who have sex with every man they can find.
There was 20 minutes of it left, so I checked to see what was on next. The movie on deck was 'The Last Samurai'. I assumed it was another penatrationless porno till I saw the description. It had Tom Cruise and Ken Wantanabe in it. Not really B flick actors. So I watched the rest of the LesboGhostSlutWestern and then watched The Last Samurai.

Holy shit was that a good movie. (The Last Samurai, not the porno.)

Here's the story from the official website:

Captain Nathan Algren (TOM CRUISE) is a man adrift. The battles he once fought now seem distant and futile. Once he risked his life for honor and country, but, in the years since the Civil War, the world has changed. Pragmatism has replaced courage, self-interest has taken the place of sacrifice and honor is nowhere to be found - especially out West where his role in the Indian Campaigns ended in disillusionment and sorrow.

Somewhere on the unforgiving plains near the banks of the Washita River, Algren lost his soul.

A universe away, another soldier sees his way of life about to disintegrate. He is Katsumoto (KEN WATANABE), the last leader of an ancient line of warriors, the venerated Samurai, who dedicated their lives to serving emperor and country. Just as the modern way encroached upon the American West, cornering and condemning the Native American, it also engulfed traditional Japan. The telegraph lines and railroads that brought progress now threaten those values and codes by which the Samurai have lived and died for centuries.

But Katsumoto will not go without a fight.

The paths of these two warriors converge when the young Emperor of Japan, wooed by American interests who covet the growing Japanese market, hires Algren to train Japan's first modern, conscript army. But as the Emperor's advisors attempt to eradicate the Samurai in preparation for a more Westernized and trade-friendly government, Algren finds himself unexpectedly impressed and influenced by his encounters with the Samurai. Their powerful convictions remind him of the man he once was.

Thrust now into harsh and unfamiliar territory, with his life and perhaps more important, his soul, in the balance, the troubled American soldier finds himself at the center of a violent and epic struggle between two eras and two worlds, with only his sense of honor to guide him.

The movie went really well with the book I am reading, called 'Flyboys', about fighter pilots from WWII, including George Bush (not Dubya). It was an interesting look into the true history of Japan, prior to the 'civilized' nations turning Japan into the monster they became in WWII.

Sometimes I think that I was alive in the wrong time period. I think that I would have made a pretty good samurai. I have the will of the warrior deep within me, but I can't unleash it, thanks to like laws and stuff...

Anyway, if you're wanting to see a good action flick with lots of blood and people, outnumbered, with swords whooping the shit out of people with guns, this is your movie. It's also good if you like samurais and stuff as well.

'Round Vegas #8

Since I still feel like crap, and don't think I can squeeze any creativity past the layer of gunk in my nose and lungs, here's some more 'Round Vegas' for ya. Just so you don't think I forgot about y'all.

A Word of Warning...

To all citizens of Las Vegas...

If I find the son of a bitch who got me sick, I'm going to jam a jagged chopstick into your eye and pull it out your ear...

You know what's even worse than working when you're sick? Not working. Any over time I get when I go back to work is null and void. :( Plus I lose 6 - 12 hours of overnight bonus pay, depending on if I go to work tonight...

DAMN YOU, WHO EVER YOU ARE!!!!

A Lesson in Futility

Occasionally I learn a lesson while I am working. Now, I try really hard not to learn anything since, as the say, ignorance is bliss, but sometimes I don't have a choice. Something happens that just sticks in my head and teaches me something.

My example today? Never live in a rural area that isn't serviced by a full time fire department.

Last Sunday I was driving around town when I hear the Clark County Fire Department dispatched to call in Sandy Valley. I feel that first I should show you where this house fire is and where Sandy Valley is.

Please click the map to enlarge

Last time I drove down there (for a different fire, oddly enough) it took me right about an hour to do. It was pitch black and the curvy, hilly road was freaking me out and I wasn't going very fast, but I don't think a big ass fire truck isn't going to get there too much quicker.

On the map I have showed you the location of the closest, full time fire station, CCFD station 65 on Starr Road. So the call goes out at 5:30AM (apx). At 5:55AM I hear the first units LEAVING the Sandy Valley fire station. At 5:30 they had requested two city units, so E65 and E24 were in route, but neither of them would arrive for another thirty minutes. I myself was not en route since my station doesn't like me wandering that far off when there is no one else working.

At about 6:10 I hear the units arriving to a 'fully involved' building. They ask for a water tender (since there are no hydrants out there) and WT14 takes off from the east side of the city I believe. LONG drive. They also ask for WT78 from Goodsprings, another CCFD volunteer unit (which means they have to wake someone up, get him to the station, and then drive the twenty minutes from Goodsprings to Sandy Valley).

Long story short, when I left work at 9AM, the fire was still burning. They had to stop fighting the fire every fifteen minutes so the water tenders could drive the five miles back to the fire station, get more water, then drive five miles back to the house, hook up to the engines, and resume fighting.

This reminded me of a story that I did a couple of winters ago. I responded to a fire on the north side of Taylorville. When I arrived the house was still fully engulfed in flames and the fire fighters were just kind of watching it.

I ask them what they are doing and they tell me 'waiting for water'. There were NO hydrants anywhere near this place. The fire trucks were driving to the lake, pumping water from that, and then returning, since the lake was closer than the nearest hydrant.

This isn't a very rural area. There were probably about fifty houses and it's only a few miles to Taylorville - which by Central Illinois standards was a decent sized town.

Watching fire fighters from all over the county showing up and being able to do nothing but watch this house burn to the ground was strange to say the least. Occasionally they would blast some water at the fire, but were quickly taught a lesson in futility.




As you can see, the fire was STILL burning the next day. In fact they eventually realized how pointless throwing water on this fire was and bulldozed the house while it was still burning. I felt terrible for the guy who lived there.

Wanting to make sure everyone gets to see some of my older work, I have included video in this post. CLICK HERE to watch the news story! It's not off air, so there are no graphics. The reporter is Chad Mahoney and only the daylight stuff was shot by someone else. I was still pretty new, so lay off the hard critiques! Enjoy.

Warning Labels...

Warning labels both piss me off and make me laugh.

They piss me off because they are made for idiots and they keep people, stupid people, who would otherwise terminate their lives in pure Darwinian style, alive. That, unfortunately, ensures that they will reproduce and continue to spread stupidity and just plain moronisness for generations to come.

Take for example an Uncle Ben's Rice Bowl. It comes with instructions which include telling you to peel back the plastic cover and stir. Then there is a warning.

CAUTION! STEAM WILL BE HOT!

Well no shit? Something that I had just microwaved for five minutes is going to be hot?!?!?!? UNBELIEVAVLE!!!!! Thank God I had that label to warn me of the potential doom I could have received. All sarcasm aside, that warning has probably stopped many people who have put there face right above the rice bowl - you know, in order to take in the aroma - from being horribly burned and taught an important lesson in life.

Hot hurts, dumbass.

Anyway, there are certain labels that just crack me up and most of these can be found on construction equipment and electrical boxes. It's not necessarily the warning themselves that make me laugh, but the illustrations (you know, for the illiterate and non-English speaking idiots).

I was sitting in the Trop and Cameron Burger King's drive the other day behind a truck that had one of those hydraulic lifts on the rear. Next to the lift were several warning labels, some having to do with no sticking your foot between the lift and the truck ('cause it will fold up and crush your foot!) and how much weight to put on the lift. But this one here is my favorite.

Sorry for the quality, but I had to enlarge it greatly. It's the top sticker and I would pay REAL money to see that happen. I don't know what the text says, but I am sure it's some dire warning about what will happen if you're stupid enough to stand under the hydraulic lift when it has a bunch of boxes atop of it.

Anyway, I laughed very hard at this sticker and the lady at Burger King thought I was on crack. So I needed to share this with you, since this week has been an amazing snooze fest at work.

Mommy's Here! YAY!

About a month ago I got some happy news! My mom called me and told me she and my step-dad were coming to town!

I love my mommy. I'm a huge mama's boy. But it's cool, since my mom kicks ass. If I remember correctly she called me a 'pussy' once when we were drinking and I had to run off and throw up.

Anyway, she came to town with a couple of their friends. Unfortunately this was still while my brakes were all FUBAR'd, so we couldn't go driving around. But I did spend some time with them when I wasn't working. The best part was when we went down to the Freemont to this ENORMOUS buffet. Lots of seafood. I am going down there again someday. I have to find someone to go with me though. I feel a little odd pigging out at a buffet by myself.

After we enjoyed the buffet we went out into the Freemont Experience. This was, as usual, the first time I had been up here. It's amazing. I've been in this town for almost 10 months and I haven't been hardly anywhere.

The Freemont Experience is pretty damn cool. There is a light and tv show that they project onto the roof of it (as illustrated in the first picture). It was pretty neat and I kind of wanted to stay and see more of it, but unfortunately I had to work. And you know the world would end if they gave anyone a day off during the book...

Anyway we took the bus back down to the Stratosphere where they were staying and I watched them gamble for a while. I then waddled off to work, worked, went home, slept, and then came back to the Strat. I gambled a bit with my mom, lost some money, won $10, and then we ate at the Strat's buffet. I really wanted to go into the tower, but my mom's passes were only good till three.

So my step-dad went off on his own and me and mom scored some tickets from this newlywed couple who - I assume - were more interested in exchanging DNA then they were in seeing a comedy show. We went down to the Rivera to watch the show.

I was terrible company this night. It was Wednesday and I was off that night, but I was sick. I think I just wasn't having enough sleep but I felt like crap. But I was able to enjoy this trio of New York comedians immensely.

After that I took mom to see my condo, and happily she didn't make fun of my massive number of anime girl posters (I tell her it was either anime or drugs...). She was proud of my ability to clean and keep it clean for at least 5 days. And she even told me that I am doing well for myself! It's nice to hear things like that from your mom, ya know.

Anyway, mom, me and old grinder (what I nicknamed my Malibu when it had grinding brakes) went back to the Strat where I kissed her good by, was sad that she was leaving, and wished her both a happy birthday and a happy anniversary. We parted ways ad I haven't seen her since!

I talked to her yesterday, but I haven't seen her.

407Zzzzzzzzzzz....

Here is the difference between a city of almost 2 million people like Las Vegas and a city of 110,000 like Springfield. In Springfield, if we heard 'attempted robbery' on the scanner we would send EVERYONE in the newsroom out to cover it. Even the janitor and the 6PM anchor's stalker.

In Vegas it's 'call me when someone's dead.'

That's why the call of a 407Z (robbery attempt) didn't even arouse my spot news ear as I slowly trolled through the 5:15AM traffic cluster-fuck in southern Las Vegas. However that didn't stop my Nextel from ringing loudly.

Erin: Yeah?
Producers: THERE'S A ROBBERY AT THE STARDUST!!!!!!
Erin: So?
Producers: You're not on your way?
Erin: No. No one was hurt and the schmuck didn't even get anything.
Producers: Oh. Okay.

So we hang up. Not 5 minutes later my phone rings again.

Erin: Hello?
Producers: 13 IS ABOUT TO GO LIVE ON THE ROBBERY!!!!!
Erin: Attempted robbery.
Producers: WE NEED YOU TO GO! We're breaking down Brandon and Martha, and they are on their way from ((way FUCKING south)).
Erin: Okay.

So I roll up the strip to Convention Center and LVB. I won't comment on the number of times I was called and asked for my ETA. I look around and don't see anything except Channel 13. I see they are in their hit and I am VERY tempted to drive my truck right behind them, but decide not to.

I eventually park and get my live set up. I finally see a couple of police cars, and oddly enough an ambulance. I shrug and give them a hit. I can't see much from my vantage point, so I disconnect my camera and walk down the street to get a better view. I shoot for 18 seconds before I hear in my IFB:

ERIN! We need your shot! Thirty seconds!

WTF? I just had a hit! So I give the early morning tourists a great show of a big fat ass running down Las Vegas Blvd tripod in my left hand, camera in my right hand, and losing my mic which was clipped onto my pocket, back to my truck. I think I heard 13 laughing at me. Of course 13 always laughs at me.

Anyway, I get my shot back up a mere second before my hit. Brandon and Martha pull up, wondering how a live shot could make me out of breath, and hop out. Martha asks me what's up, and I shrug.

Brandon looks around and probably ponders why there is no crime scene. My truck is already set up and tuned in, so Brandon runs off to look for more police cars (there were two sitting out in front of the casino. No tape, no flashing lights, just two police cars). Martha does the best she can with the information we had (ahem, none). Of course the anchors ask her questions, and she again says 'I don't know, dammit', only in a more professional, polite way.

Brandon eventually returns and confirms that there is a whole lot of nothing going on anywhere near the casino. He goes off to shoot the rest of the video while I edit a look live tease and a rather shabby VO for later. This apparently is Brandon and Martha's story for the rest of the morning.

The angle?

The poor bastard working inside had some sort of medical condition. When the robber robbed him, it aggravated his condition and that is why both the robber got nothing and the ambulance was there.

I don't remember if the guy was ever caught, nor do I remember anything else about this. I am STILL convinced that there was no story here, but I have since be informed that no matter what happens, if it happens in a casino, it's news. I don't really buy that otherwise I would be covering 192 fights every night and 772 drunks getting mouthy with security. Neither NBC (who we are in a ratings fight with, not 13) nor FOX (who usually eats up non-stories like they were ecstasy covered Skittles) were there.

I take that back, NBC sent Ganamir, their overnight photog, to shoot video, but no reporter.

I shouldn't complain though. I've got a huge crush on Martha, our new overnight reporter, so anytime I get her in front of my lens I should be thrilled. I just always wonder though, when I'm out on this silly crap, if I am missing something more important. I think that one of my main strengths are killed when I lose the ability to be mobile, like when I am on a live shot.

One of the things that bothers me about this business is the whole rush to be 'first' on the scene and 'first' on the air. But I question, does it really matter? I have yet to meet one person, that isn't a television person, who watches more than one channel at once. It kind of makes me miss my one-station Podunk town of Springfield where it didn't matter when we got there. We were always first! Six months later, we'd be first!

Sometimes I think TV news is a bitch in desperate need of a bitch-slapping. I can't wait to see what kind of comments that garners.

New Baby!

I want to give congratulations to my friend Jerry, back in Springfield. His wife April just gave birth to an adoreable baby boy.

Erin Riley Chronister
Born: November 19, 2005 @ Memorial Hospital
5 lbs 9 ozs 20 inches long

I'll be honest here. I am extremely flattered that my very good friend would name one of his children after me. (Yes, that is why his name is spelled the Irish way!) Jerry has been a very good friend for as long as I can remember him. I doubt I will ever be able to do something for him that will equal naming his child after me, but I will try.

Loud Noises Make Me Horny!

Not really, but I do love being loud and annoying, and I hardly get the chance. But I've always wanted to play an instrument.

When I was just a wee lad I played the sax, then the trumpet, then the clarinet, then the piano, then - well you get the point. I never really stuck with anything. Two instruments I DID want to learn how to play though, and would have stuck with it (quit laughing, Mom) were the drums and the bass guitar.

Now I was forbidden from playing the drums by my grandmother. Apparently my father played them, and since he was a no good bastard who ran out on my Mom, my grandmother some how formed a connection. You see, apparently if I had played the drums I would have ran out on my baby's mama as well! Don't even ask me what she had against guitars. Must have been the whole 'rock-and-roll-tool-of-Satan' thing.

Anyway, so I have been interested in picking up one of these two instruments. I'm looking for opinions. I think playing the bass would be fun - and maybe I could join a blues band! But the drums are SO much louder!

Here are my questions:

• Are the drums HARD to learn? Will I have an advantage since I a) act idiotic and play air drums b) have experience with music and mostly remember how to read sheet music?


• Is it difficult to teach your extremities to move at different speeds? I know I have the ability - I can rub my stomach and pat my head at the same time (don't laugh, I have been told that's a difficult thing to do).


• Can you effectively learn on a small kit? I obviously cannot go out and buy a full size drum set. I live in a condo/apartment and I'd be evicted within 10 minutes of my first solo.


• Is the bass pretty easy to learn? It's only got four strings...


• Will a teacher laugh at me because I'm old? (Well, older than most people learning an instrument.)

If you play, I'd love your comments and opinions!

Rock & Roll!

'Round Vegas #7

Man, I love the top of the airport parking garage.

Kitty Blogs?

I love kitty cats. I know, I am a guy, so I am susposed to love dogs. But I don't. I think it was because I grew up with my great-grandmother's cats (Ashley and Misty), so I have a special place in my cholestral clogged heart for cats. This is why I am going to add a link coloum for blogs that have kitties in them!

Almost all of these blogs will probably have been found via the 'next blog' function. :)

Anyway, here is the FIRST addition!: Roqqys blog

December

I love Linkin Park, so if I ever have a reason to post their lyrics, I do! Here is 'My December', since it's December and stuff.

My December - Linkin Park

This is my December / This is my time of the year
This is my December / This is all so clear
This is my December / This is my snow covered home
This is my December / This is me alone

And I / Just wish that I didn't feel like there was something I missed
And I / Take back all the things I said To make you feel like that
And I / Just wish that I didn't feel like there was something I missed
And I / Take back all the things I said to you

And I give it all away / Just to have somewhere to go to
Give it all away / To have someone to come home to

This is my December / These are my snow-covered trees
This is me pretending / This is all I need

And I / Just wish that I didn't feel like there was something I missed
And I / Take back all the things I said to make you feel like that
And I / Just wish that I didn't feel like there was something I missed
And I / Take back all the things I said to you

And I give it all away / Just to have somewhere to go to
Give it all away / To have someone to come home to

This is my December / This is my time of the year
This is my December / This is all so clear

And I give it all away / Just to have somewhere to go to
Give it all away / To have someone to come home to

Special note: The photo is of downtown Minneapolis in December.

Taking Bets!

It's 10:24. HVAC repair people are supposed to be here between 9 and 12.

I've ran out of food I don't have to cook and Diet Pepsi.

What do you want to bet that if I leave to go to the convenience store and McDonald's (probably a 10 minute trip) that they will show up?

Let's find out!

UPDATE!

10:29, I'm driving down my street when I see a 'Lin Air' van drive by and stop in front of my apartment.

It's like when you are waiting for your food. The quickest way to get it there is to light up a new cigarette.